The Wanted War Criminal of Teutonics Cat is a huge, safe nation, remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, compulsory military service, and ubiquitous missile silos. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 898 million Teutonics Catians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The relatively small, moralistic government prioritizes Defense, although Administration, Education, and Law & Order are also considered important, while International Aid and Spirituality receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mouse City. The average income tax rate is 15.6%.

The strong Teutonics Catian economy, worth 59.0 trillion Catnips a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Gambling industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is 65,646 Catnips, with the richest citizens earning 5.3 times as much as the poorest.

The most popular WhoTube videos are ones featuring parodies of iconic songs, all government facilities are built in the subterranean citadel of Mouse City, wood-framed catapults are ready to launch diseased corpses into besieged cities, and toxic smog is dismissed as the populace just "letting off steam". Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Teutonics Cat's national animal is the Mouse, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Teutonics Cat is ranked 13,521^st in the world and 229^th in The North Pacific for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 8,115.87 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.